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When You are gone, who do I become?
When I am gone, who was I ?

The closer you get to the first row, the less there are backs to hide behind.

The clown Halla Kalma has the first time in her life a place in the first row and now she should dare to look at the death from eye to eye  - as if there isn’t enough astonishment with life!

Main themes in the solo performance of Soile Mäkelä are death and the hunger of life, shivering in the shadows of the fear of death.

The show can be seen as a closure for the griefing period, completly ridiculous performance, reaching towards acceptance of the dark colours in life.

Duration: 30 min

Language:  Finnish


In the mid 90’ Soile’s inner clown showed up briefly at the workshop with Philippe Gaulier, but Soile did not recognise her.

Ten years later, in Italy, as a student of Giovanni Fusetti, Soile met her wanna be authoritative clown, Adolfa Romualda and she understood what Gaulier meant. Adolfa forced Soile to do street theatre during the summer of 2002 with international clown group La Famiglia Finnapone.

Mäkelä continued seeking her personal ridiculousness in 2008 and 2010 in Switzerland with Pierre Byland. With Mario Gonzalez she deepened her stupidness in 2008 in Italy and in 2010 and 2012 in Finland

After this Soile has directed two clown shows (Tanssiteatteri Hurjaruuth: Ruma Ankanpoikanen 2012 ja Teatteri Metamorfoosi: Femmes Fatales -The General Theory of Love 2013).

In addition she has taught many clown workshops, especially enjoying to continue the Theatre Game method of Mario Gonzalez. In Teatteri Metamorfoosi, she has lead MetaLAB -movement laboratory researching clownery and organized The Smallest Mask in the World -edition in 2013 at the MasQue- International Mask Theatre Festival in Helsinki.

In the summer 2016, Soile found a new level in her goofiness when melancholic Halla Kalma clown was born at the Red Nose -workshop of Giovanni Fusetti in Helsinki.

In the fall 2017 Mäkelä started to research the relationship between clown and the holiness at the MetaLAB-movement laboratory called HolyCLOWN! 2019 she started new longterm educational concept at Metamorfoosi called MetaPLATFORM. The theme of the pilot year was clownery. 2019 Soile started also weekly Clown Chorus meetings at MetaLAB together with musician Eero Savela. 2020 she will share the direction with music pedagogue and great clown Helena Leminen.

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